“I am a bad friend”, this is what I posted on one of my best friend’s facebook page the day after her birthday. I had forgotten. Well, forgotten is probably not quite the right word, I knew her birthday was coming up, although I wasn’t sure about the exact date, and I meant to ask her what she wanted for her birthday, but as with a lot of things in my life I had not gotten around to it.
The problem I have is that no only is my memory shocking (and I even think this is an understatement), but I also seem to only be able to remember to do things when I’m not actually able to do them. I remember I need to put the rubbish out when I’m on the bus, but by the time I get home it’s gone and I walk straight past the bin. I remember that I need to phone my buildings insurance company just as I get into bed, the next morning it’s gone. I remember to buy a birthday (or other occasion) card, I even write it, put a stamp on it, but then forget to post it until it’s so embarrassingly late I might as well not bother.
As I have had a baby less than 18 months ago, I often use the “baby brain” excuse, although I really doubt it has anything to do with that. Although prior to having a baby I was often able to avoid problems as I was able to, as and when I remembered things, drop everything I was doing and do whatever I needed to do before it would slip my mind again. For obvious reasons I can no longer do this.
The weird thing about the whole memory business is that even though I know very well how quickly I forget things, I still think I won’t. I still often go to the shop without a list because I think that as I only need 3 things, surely I’ll be able to remember – I really should know better by now. And this is not counting the times when I have written a list which I left on the kitchen table.
But nothing I mentioned above is an excuse to forget a good friend’s birthday, and I feel sufficiently bad. Luckily, my friend doesn’t mind because she knows about the horrendous gap in my brain where my memory should have been, and she knows the missing of her birthday has no real relation to our friendship.
So before it slips my mind, I’m sorry I forgot your birthday Ragger, I’ll make sure I put it in next year’s diary…..if I remember…..